VEN (BOLLYWOOD) — Ever since she was a little girl, tomboy Nimrata Randhawa enjoyed climbing trees and working on outboard motors and automobile transmissions.
“Acting like a man, made me feel more like a girl,” Ms Randhawa told VEN‘s Senior Gender-Neutral Correspondent Edward Wood during a brisk game of 8-ball at Ginger’s in Brooklyn Tuesday, which Ms Randhawa won easily to the delight of her Sapphic entourage.
“Men are idiots. And that’s where I come in. My job is to remind them that they need to take out the trash, cut the grass, open jars, and get things off high places. Like a Sikh guru, I trained my voice to sound worse than finger nails on a blackboard. And boy can I be mean!”
She affects a dead-eye thousand yard stare.
“For those who don’t have our backs, we’re taking names. Not bad, right?
She repeats the line, only more ominously this time.
“F^^^ng scared you a little bit, right? (laughs) F^^^ing men. You’re such a bunch of pussies!”
So how does she feel about voicing Petruchio in the new Disney Taming of The Shrew?
“I told them the character needs balls, OK, so I played him as a woman. I out-shrewed the shrew.
“When I think of Kate I think of the UN General Assembly, and I just let her f^^^ing have it, like I’m f^^^ing Leona Helmsley in drag and I just got my tax bill!”
Developing . . . .