“All Right Everyone, Line Up Alphabetically According To Your Height” — Ocasio-Cortez Wins Coveted Casey Stengel Award!
BREAKING — SPLC/ACLU Declare Cleveland Indians Hate Group, Demand Team Be Renamed Cleveland Puerto Ricans!
Fauxcahontas Fights Back — Great Great Grandmother Abducted By Comanches, Rescued By Confederate Uncle!
New On NETFLIX — The Boys On The 7th Floor (Three Dirty Cops And The Only Woman Bad Enough To Love Them All!)
I’m Ready For My Closeup, Chief Justice Roberts! Ruth Bader-Ginsburg’s Astonishing Transformation After Dead Sea Spa Treatment!
EXCLUSIVE! Second Immigrant Child Dies After Forced To Dance The Hokey Pokey — For Five Days Straight!
