VEN (WASHINGTON) — Outraged at what she believes are strict constitutionalist judicial nominees who in all likelihood will upset the radical left balance of the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals by refusing to legislate from the bench, former radical Leprechaun Party organizer and current US Senator Patty Murray (D-WA) is urging the Judiciary Committee to delay confirmation hearings on Eric Miller until the President can find a more acceptable nominee, “who will seek to obstruct this president in everything he tries to do until we can impeach him and drive him from office!”

Citing her close ties to the Keebler Foundation, whose former CEO is Ms Murray’s current husband, Rob (the two met after college while working as bridge trolls in Seattle), the Senator suggested one of the cis-gendered transitioning Pecan Sandy elves might be the better choice for the Ninth Circuit.
“I would hope,” Ms Murphy explained to reporters Sunday, from her giant toadstool garden in the Magical Kingdom of Whidbey Island, “that a wise transgendered elfin woman with the richness of her experiences would more often than not reach a better conclusion than a white male who hasn’t lived that life.”
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