VEN (PRETORIA) — In a shocking display of political corruption, South Africa’s President Cyril Ramaphosa has been outed as the covert head of a pan-African jenkem empire that encompasses all of sub-Saharan Africa, and reaches as far north as Lybia and the Sudan!
“With his son Tumelo running the day-to-day operations and the complicity of almost every African head of state,” a senior South African official explained to reporters Wednesday, “Mr Ramaphosa has been making hundreds of millions of rands off the suffering of what should be his native African brothers. It’s outrageous!
“You want to know why African men are raping green monkeys — jenkem. Why they are raping babies in the false belief that it will somehow prevent AIDS — jenkem. Dancing with corpses — jenkem. Conflict diamonds — jenkem!
“Darfur, Rwanda, the Congo — jenkem, jenkem, jenkem!
“Every misery visited upon our African brothers and sisters emanates from one source — jenkem — and Ramaphosa is behind it all!”
Operating clandestinely for decades, Mr Ramaphosa’s jenkem empire began to unravel in late March and then reached a tipping point Thursday, when his son and chief lieutenant Tumelo accused the son of former South African President Zuma of being “a fool and a f***ing monkey” on Instagram, after Mr Zuma’s son — himself a jenkem addict — tried to kill three black South African farmers by mistake.
“We want to kill the Boer,” EFF leader Julius Malema explained to reporters outside his palace Thursday. “What good does it do us if we get high on jenkem and kill each other?! How does this further the cause of white genocide in South Africa??!
“Our goal is to kill every white man, woman, and child in our country. Only then can we put down our machetes and screw drivers, our battery acid, and step back and declare proudly — We are the new Zimbabwe! We did what the Mau Mau’s of Kenya could never do!
“Only then will we have the time to huff jenkem, smoke opium, and inject ourselves with heroin and morphine 24/7, immolate one another, murder and rape each other as we please, without fear of a white man trying to put us in jail for behaving like — as they would say — a bunch of psychotic, murderous kaffir savages!
“Death to the Boer!”
A furious Mr Malema vehemntly denied reports that he, too, was profiting from Ramaphosa’s jenkem empire, at one point telling a white journalist from the UK, “You ask me another question like that, and I will have my men cut off your ears!”
Developing . . . .