What I Did For Love! The Short, Tragic Life Of Socks The Cat

VEN (HOLLYWOOD) — In her latest unauthorized biography DECLAWED — Cats, Rats, And The Love That Dare Not Speak Its Name, shock biographer to the stars Kitty Kelley contends that Clinton family pet Socks The Cat attempted suicide three times during the Monica Lewinsky scandal, and lived out the rest of his short, tragic life despondent, hooked on pills and booze, and waiting for Bill to grow tired of the constant parade of aides and interns, while suffering the devastating humiliation of Huma Abedin eventually replacing Socks in Hillary’s affections.

Based in large part on Socks’ diary and interviews with his closest friends, the “tell-all”  is chock full of such shocking revelations  as late night booze and catnip-fueled orgies in the Oval Office; three ways with Bill, Mickey, and Minnie Mouse; and a tragic, abusive homoerotic affair with then-married heroin addict Felix The Cat.

Friends of the former First Lady  dismissed Kelley’s claims as “baseless” and “the worst kind of yellow pressing,” insisting that Socks suffered from a misdiagnosed bi-polar disorder which caused him to make many bizarre and outrageous accusations as he spiraled out of control — bitterly jealous of the President’s dog Buddy — before finally taking his own life in 2009.