VEN (ROME) — As the old saying goes,  no celebration of St. Irenaeus’s Feast Day would be complete without a wild, drug-fueled, homoerotic clerical orgy at an apartment owned by the Vatican’s Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith in Rome, the very organization charged with investigating clerical sexual abuse cases in the Church.

And this year — quia peccavi nimis — was no different.

Unfortunately, however — mea culpa —  this time the apostate catamites drew the ire of their neighbors by belting out amyl nitrate-inspired show tunes and playing their Best of Freddie Mercury and Cher DVDs at ear-piercing volume until finally — mea maxima culpa! — the police were called.

And then, well  . . . . Ite, missa est!

Ideo precor beatam Mariam semper Virginem,
omnes Angelos et Sanctos,
et vos, fratres, orare pro me
ad Dominum Deum nostrum

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