Bad Day At Brack Rock

VEN (SEOUL) — After executing his favorite uncle in 2013, claiming he was a traitor for not learning how to Jitterbug correctly,  The Most Glorious Supreme Universal Leader has his invincible Korean People’s Navy (KPN) holding its collective breath Tuesday, after a state photograph designed to demonstrate the Naval might of the tiny Communist nation contained the string from the Beijing tag sale clearly visible in front of the  main access hatch.


As one anonymous source told VEN, “Admiral Kim ordered the price tag removed, but a seaman in his haste apparently pulled it off the string, leaving the string behind.  Allowing price tags to remain on KPN ships is a capital offense.  In this instance,  however, the seaman and the admiral are very fortunate, since they are only looking at 100 to 200 years in prison!”

This latest setback comes on the heels of a failed missile launch on Saturday, intended to strike terror into the hearts of a Paper Tiger Trump administration.  Instead, the missile exploded seconds after takeoff, resulting in the immediate execution of anyone even remotely involved in the exercise, including 200 North Korean women vigorously waving flags, which the Most Glorious And Infallible Leader declared forced the missile off course contributing to the disaster.