That’s Retarded! LeBron James To Talk Racism At White House?

Mr Kushner casts about surreptitiously to see if anyone noticed him eat a spider.

VEN (TEL AVIV) — In yet another shocking development during the RNC, the President’s human-like, preying mantis shape-shifting son-in-law Jared Kusher — known to Washington insiders as the Yentl Rasputin of the Trump Administration — invited 60-IQ high school graduate and professional basketball player LeBron James to the White House Thursday to discuss race reflations, after earlier in the week a woke Mr James not only infuriated China, but confused the league and himself by calling for NBA players to boycott the NBA, thereby potentially forfeiting thousands of dollars in television revenue as well as their paychecks.

Many Democrats are denouncing the so-called King James Summit as yet another clumsy attempt by Republicans to pander to black American voters who — despite comprising only 13% of the population — make up over 85% of all registered voters in the United States, thanks in large part to the tireless efforts of ACORN, More Than a Vote, the Waffle House, Yo! Dolla Stores, and the Department of Motor Vehicles.

Additionally, many on the right are questioning the wisdom of such a move in the wake of Mr James’ bizarre appearance on Sesame Street in late June when the basketball player got into a heated dispute with Kermit the Frog over the letter “C”, calling him a “green, fly eatin’, cracker-ass frog” and later punched and attempted to strangle Count von Count when Mr James was unable to recall the number that follows 7 (that number is 8) and mistakenly believed that the Muppet was taunting him.

“Dat shit is jess the why manz math,” a still angry Mr James explained to reporters after the taping of the show. “We built dah damn muthaf**kin pyramids! Who need to know what 6 times 7 be? Aight? An y’all can go f*** y’all selfs — I an’t takin’ no sh!t from no damn bitch-azz puppet! Dat puppet iza BUM!”

Anonymous White House officials told VEN‘s Senior Claude-Levi-Strauss Correspondent Léon Rom that they hope to discuss with Mr James the intricacies of systemtic racsim as outlined in the writings of W.E.B DeBois, Franz Fanon,

Langston Hughes, Kimberlé Crenshaw, and most importantly the recurring Black Panther superhero who appears in many Marvel Comic Books (and was first introduced as part of the Fantastic Four) and specifically how rioting and looting were handled in Wakanda when a violent Wakandan felon with outstanding warrants and high on drugs was shot after attacking police officers and resisting arrest, a subject about which Mr James is believed to be a world renown expert.

Developing . . . .