Future-Former Econ Advisor Gary Cohn To Pursue Career As Break Dancer!

VEN (NEW YORK) — To the throbbing beat of ear-splitting house music,  former Goldman-Sach’s president and Trump Economic Advisor Gary Cohn — dressed in a black sharkskin Versace warmup suit and matching vucana wool yamaka — practiced his breakdancing moves with coach Adam Sevani in a Tribeca loft Wednesday morning, one gary-cohnday after resigning from the Trump administration.

Mr Cohn, who now prefers to be called The NoTorEuS J-to-the-E-to-the-Double-V B.O.Y., explained to VEN‘s Senior Dance Correspondent Deney Terrio,  that since his days in at the  American University’s Kogod School of Business in Washington, DC, where he spent a majority of his time in hip-hop clubs in Anacostia, he has been busting moves in his spare time in the hopes of one day becoming a “dope” breakdancing street performer in New York’s Time Square.

“Yo, Ima b-boying now, muthaf**ka!  Ima make New Yawk mah bitch! Y’all make it there, you make it anywhere. Y’all know what I sayin’?”  an out-of-breath Mr Cohn explained,  as he worked on what he hopes will become his signature toprocking moves.

4f4c4900a11e01330399488hip-hop-and-break-dancing-show-instinct-20122-555x345However,  a guarded Mr Sevani was not as sanguine about Mr Cohn’s prospects, at least in the short term.

“He needs to get in the gym and lose some weight, you know so he can windmill and L-kick and so forth.  But he’s got a lot of heart, the Mossad loves him, and he’s currently  in negotiations with Dreamworks for a prime-time movie and  a three-year reality TV package, so we’ll see where this takes us.  It’s going to be quite a ride!”

“Damn straight!” a six-stepping Mr Cohn replied.  “Y’all fo’ shizzle my nizzle!”

Developing . . . .