Ever wondered, hey, is my guy a sociopath? He looks normal. But so did the last five guys I dated! A sociopath is incapable of love and affection, but is adept at pretending to be caring and considerate — until he gets what he wants. A real wolf in sheep’s clothing! So how can you tell if Mr Right is really just another toxic, sociopathic Mr Wrong? Instead of crossing your fingers and kissing yet another frog, take this short quiz and find out!
- Is he a politician?
- Is he a senior executive in a large corporation?
- Is he on TV news, but not a weatherman?
- Does he like to take crazy risks, like speeding through a school zone?
- Do you always lend him money after you tell yourself 1000 times you’ll never do it again. But when you look into his big, wide, sparkling eyes you get so mesmerized, all you can think about is the great sex that leaves you feeling like 10 worn-out beat to the wide Raggedy Ann dolls?
- Is he a priest?
- Does he pretend to like your mother so much that she starts flirting with him?
- Does he ask you to “dress slutty,” and then spends the whole night talking to strangers — or worse — your best friend?
- Even though he swears he voted for Jill Stein, do you get the feeling that he really, REALLY voted for Donald Trump?
- Is he Donald Trump?
RESULTS — If you answered yes to even one question, chances are very good that he’s a sociopath. Up to five YES’s, and he’s channeling Bill Clinton. Over five, watch out — you could be dating the next Ted Bundy!
VERY ERSATZ NEWS 