Kafka News Network (HERMITAGE, TN)— Frustrated in her bid to acquire the Santa Ana Lionettes of the National Pro Fastball League, former Homeland Security Director, Janet Napolitano — and a consortium of investors that includes Huma Abedin, Rosie O’Donnell, and Hillary Clinton — has been granted a new Fastball League franchise in Oakland, California.
Led by slugger Samantha (Sam) “Cool Mama Bell” Atkinson, the Oakland Gertrude Steins will take the field in 2017, time-sharing a ballpark with the East Oakland High School Lady Skinheads, until their own facility is completed sometime in mid 2018.
VERY ERSATZ NEWS 