Kafka Network News (HOLLYWOOD) — Unverified reports are circulating around West Hollywood and parts of Brentwood that former Notre Dame Head Coach and possible Sonny and Cher lovechild — Charlie Weis — will reunite with estranged possible brother Chaz Bono while in town later this month, when he’ll be paired with long time gal-pal and celebrity stalker Nancy Grace on Dancing With The Stars.

As many college football fans might recall, before returning to competative ballroom dancing, Coach Weiss was the only Notre Dame Head Coach  to beat Michawauka High School in 3 out of 5 unsanctioned pre-season tune-up games,  owing to his mastery of doing everything Bill Belichick told him to do as Offensive Coordinator with the New England Patriots.

After being fired by Notre Dame at the end of yet another spectacularly dreadful season in 2009,  Weis briefly returned to the NFL,  before heading to Gainsville, Florida  as Offensive Coordinator to help Will Muschamp dismantle the University of Florida football program, and later did the same thing as Head Coach at Kansas, before finally retiring.