VEN (WASHINGTON, DC) — Martha Mitchell, the eccentric and wildly loquacious wife of President Nixon’s Attorney General John Mitchell, whose motto I love its gentle warble, I love its gentle flow, I love to wind my tongue up, And I love to let it go famously manifested itself in outrageous late night alcohol-fueled phone calls to various reporters where she dished the dirt on the Nixon Administration, bequeathed in her will an eponymous award to be bestowed annually on the American politician “who — lacking restraint — most closely embodies the spirit of unbridled bombastic invective with aplomb.”
What sealed the deal for Mr Trump’s nomination for the Mitchell Award were a series of intemperate late night posts on the President’s Truth Social media platform in which he insulted and excoriated his nemesis Bruce Springsteen, referring to the famous rock star as This dried out ‘prune’ of a rocker (his skin is all atrophied!) ought to KEEP HIS MOUTH SHUT until he gets back into the Country, that’s just ‘standard fare.’ Then we’ll all see how it goes for him, President Trump called for an investigation into Springsteen, Beyoncé, Oprah, and Bono, whose paid appearances at Kamala Harris’s campaign rallies, the President asserted, constituted illegal campaign contributions:
HOW MUCH DID KAMALA HARRIS PAY BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN FOR HIS POOR PERFORMANCE DURING HER CAMPAIGN FOR PRESIDENT?
WHY DID HE ACCEPT THAT MONEY IF HE IS SUCH A FAN OF HERS? ISN’T THAT A MAJOR AND ILLEGAL CAMPAIGN CONTRIBUTION? WHAT ABOUT BEYONCÉ? …AND HOW MUCH WENT TO OPRAH, AND BONO???
I am going to call for a major investigation into this matter. Candidates aren’t allowed to pay for ENDORSEMENTS, which is what Kamala did, under the guise of paying for entertainment.
In addition, this was a very expensive and desperate effort to artificially build up her sparse crowds. IT’S NOT LEGAL! For these unpatriotic ‘entertainers,’ this was just a CORRUPT & UNLAWFUL way to capitalize on a broken system.
The head of the Martha Mitchell Foundation, Winzola McLendon, told VEN‘s Senior Clap Back Correspondent, Sidney Falco, that after those priceless screeds President Trump was a shoe-in for the Mitchell Award.
“Nobody could EVER top that, not even Martha! It was nuts!”
A delighted President Trump told reporters Sunday that he was honored by the nomination, and although he had only read part of the book, he loved the movie and thought Clark Gabel was “really terrific” as Rhett Butler.
Developing . . . .
VERY ERSATZ NEWS 