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VEN (WASHINGTON) — On Tuesday evening President Trump sent out a barrage of posts on Truth Social renaming several popular US holidays, as well as the Persian Gulf (now known as the Gulf of Mexico).

Juneteenth will become Sanford and Son Day, Thanksgiving is being changed to Planes, Trains, and Automobiles Day, Christmas will become Big Toy Day (after his initial suggestion of Home Alone Day previewed poorly among the White House staff), and starting in 2026, Cinco de Mayo will be known simply as Cisco and Pancho Day.

The President is also adding a new holiday, Moon Day, on July 20th, to commemorate the first moon landing.

VEN‘s Senior Sabbatical Correspondent, Macon Leary, reports that the President is asking ASCAP and BMI to allow his staff to rewrite lyrics and titles to popular holiday songs in keeping with the name changes, as in I’m dreaming of a white Big Toy Day, It’s Beginning to Look A lot Like Big Toy Day, and I’ll be Home For Big Toy Day.

White House Press Secretary, Karoline Leavitt, who graduates from the 8th grade in early June, announced that Mr Trump also wants to have a national contest in conjunction with Americas’ Got Talent, to create new songs for his new holiday names and to perhaps add lyrics to the theme song for Sanford and Son.

“The President,” Ms Levitt explained, “was spitballing lyrics with Vice President Vance the other day, and it went pretty well. They came up with Fred’s a junkman, and the junkman has a son. They be funky and they has a lot of fun!

“So from Moon Day to Big Toy Day, President Trump is truly making American holidays great again!”

Developing . . . .